Shadow Work: What is it? Cause it’s not what Instagram told you.

Shadow work, chances are, you have heard of it. Whether you are just starting your healing journey or have been healing for years, Shadow Work is something you should familiarize yourself with, even if you don’t plan on using it. Shadow work has become one of the most popular concepts in modern spirituality and self-help. It appears literally everywhere, and I’m not just talking about TikTok. It’s spoken of in tarot communities, therapy spaces, in witchcraft, and even in wellness culture. But what is Shadow Work, really?

Shadow Work isn’t simply just filling out journal prompts or “healing your inner child,” though those are important parts of the process. Shadow Work is rooted in the work of Carl Jung; you may have heard of him. Carl describes Shadow work as a process, and not a short one. It brings us face-to-face with the unconscious parts of ourselves that we reject, suppress, or deny altogether. This process isn’t for the faint of heart or people who aren’t ready to face the hard truths about themselves. It’s uncomfortable, transformative, and most importantly, deeply human.

The Concept

To better understand the process, we first need to understand the concept. The Shadow is the unconscious part of the psyche. The part of us that contains aspects of ourselves that we hide from others, and more often from ourselves. Something important to note is that The Shadow isn’t just “Darkness”. It typically contains traits deemed unacceptable by society, but it can also contain our strengths and gifts. It’s easy to identify the negative “dark” traits in The Shadow, for example, anger, jealousy, selfishness, insecurity, manipulation, and greed. However, the more positive or disowned shadow traits might include things like confidence, sensuality, ambition, creativity, and emotional honesty. Acknowledging these traits in ourselves and being aware of them is the first step, but “One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the darkness conscious.” There’s still more work to do. Before we can truly confront these traits, we need to know how these Shadows form.

How Shadows Form

We aren’t born with these Shadows, so where do they come from? Think back to your childhood, do you remember being told things like “Good girls don’t get angry,” or “Boys shouldn’t cry,” or my personal favorite as a teen, “You’re too much”? These small, seemingly unimportant moments taught us what emotions and behaviors were “acceptable.” we didn’t know at the time, but those phrases made you quieter and you pushed down the parts of you that made you “too much” or “angry” to keep us safe, lovable, and approved.

These moments started the building of what Jung refers to as a Persona. You probably know what a persona is, but let me define it for you anyway. Jung defines a Persona as “the social mask we wear to function in society.” Carl also states that the more rigid the persona, the larger the Shadow grows. This doesn’t mean that when we are alone, we are our most authentic selves; more often than not, the Persona carries over even when no one is watching. This is where the Shadow really grows, when we deny parts of ourselves even when no one is watching.

So if our personas are so strong, when do the Shadows come out? Before we go any further, let me tell you a story. I have a sister, a twin in fact, and while we love each other very much, we are polar opposites. She’s had two kids, I have no desire to have children, she's a Christian, I’m a pagan. I could create a list a mile long on all the ways we are different, but that is mostly irrelevant for this story. My life has recently been changing, and one of the biggest changes is that I have separated from my husband. Keep in mind, I don’t have children with my husband, and our situation didn’t include copious amounts of money or property. But when I told my sister, you would have thought I sprouted horns and wings and started toting around a pitchfork. She became livid to the point of calling me out on social media and tagging my business in posts on Instagram. Not only did she blast me on social media, but she also blamed my parents for my decision to separate as well. She was sending hateful texts

Now you’re probably asking yourself, “Why are you telling me this?” When I told my sister I was leaving my husband, she became triggered, and this caused her shadow self to come out. Why did she post hateful things on Instagram? To put it plainly, she was projecting. Her fears and past experiences with my parents' separation affected my parents and me. Projection often happens when the qualities we strongly judge in others often point toward unconscious material within ourselves. This can also look like judging what is perceived as arrogance while suppressing our own confidence or even idolizing traits we secretly desire.

What Shadow Work Actually Is.

If you have made it this far, congratulations. The answer you have long been waiting for has finally arrived. Seeing through all the fluff and trends on social media is tough, believe me, I definitely had my own misconceptions about shadow work. We know now that Shadow Work is a process, but at its core, it is conscious self- confrontation. I know that doesn’t really make anything clearer, but what does this look like in practice? It begins with becoming self-aware, noticing your unconscious patterns, becoming aware of suppressed emotions, and, most importantly, integrating the rejected parts of ourselves.

Before I tell you the ultimate goal of Shadow Work, I’d like to clear up common misconceptions. Shadow Work is NOT pretending to be “dark and mysterious” and moving to a dark gothic home, though that would be awesome. It’s not endless trauma dumping on your friends or partner. It’s definitely not analyzing every feeling or emotion obsessively. The goal of Shadow Work is not achieving perfection or becoming “fully healed.”

The ultimate goal of Shadow Work is integration. Carl Jung believed the goal was wholeness, not purity. Shadow Work allows us to become more conscious of our emotions, triggers, and reactions; in turn, this allows us to become more authentic. This journey isn’t easy, it’s uncomfortable, and there will likely be times in your Shadow Work process that you feel like it’s not working, or you're worse than before. But before you can start healing, you must first acknowledge The Shadow.

How To Begin Safely and Honestly

Okay, you’ve made it through all the stories and theories, but what can you actually do to start Shadow Work? First, begin by becoming aware of what triggers you emotionally. Strong emotional reactions often point toward hidden wounds, fears, or disowned traits. Ask yourself tough questions when you feel triggered. Questions like “Why does this bother me so deeply?”, “What does this situation remind me of?” and “What emotion am I avoiding underneath the reaction?” During this process, it’s important to remember the goal here isn’t to judge ourselves, but to be curious.

Second, and this one is an oldie but a goodie, begin a shadow journal. While many journals ask the tough questions for you with prompts that really get you thinking, others have you track recurring relationship patterns, repeated fears, shame responses, and more. Whatever journal you choose should focus on patterns, not just feelings. If you’re looking for a journal, I have made my own that you can download HERE. Asking things like “What emotion was unacceptable in my childhood?” and “What parts of you do you try to hide?"

The third and probably most underrated way to begin Shadow Work is to create through the unconscious. Jung believed the unconscious communicates symbolically. Have you ever had a dream where your teeth fell out, or you made a drastic change to your hair? That is your subconscious mind trying to tell you something. I’m not saying every dream has meaning or should be interpreted, but dreams are linked to the unconscious and often reflect our subconscious thoughts through symbolism. Other ways to create through unconscious means may include intuitive art, tarot reflection, or poetry. The unconscious usually reveals itself through symbols before words.

The Shadow I Not Your Enemy

Congratulations, you’ve made it to the end. If you take nothing else from this brief explanation, take this. Shadow Work is not evil; it is the hidden parts of ourselves asking to be seen. Shadow Work is not about becoming perfect or “fully healed”; it’s about becoming more honest, conscious, and whole. Healing does not begin when we become lighter. It begins when we become honest.

Sources

• The Truth About Shadow Work and Carl Jung — Columbus Art Therapy

• How Shadow Work Became a Scam and What to Do — Reddit (r/Jung)

• Shadow Work — Conni Biesalski

Additional Reading

• The Truth About Shadow Work and Carl Jung‍ ‍

• How Shadow Work Became a Scam and What to Do‍ ‍

• Shadow Work by Conni Biesalski‍ ‍

• Carl Jung Resources — C.G. Jung Institute Zürich